Free Class to Talk About Sex!
 
Learn how to have open, calm, straightforward, factual conversation about sexual activity – while breathing through discomfort – in order to take away embarrassment! Enhance talking with dates and partners.
 
 
NEXT CLASSES FOR WOMEN WILL BE
TUESDAY, January 10, 6:00 – 9:00pm
THURSDAY, February 16, 6:00 - 9:00pm

CLASS IS FREE!
 
Classes will be held in Camarillo in our large, private office.
Call or email to hold your place. 805-987-5647
 
We are offering classes for women and for men who want to learn how to talk about sex openly and comfortably so they can remove the embarrassment that comes from this kind of conversation. This can help you talk with your dates or partners in a way that can enhance using sex to express love and commitment.
 
NOT FOR PURPOSES OF AROUSAL: WE WILL REMOVE embarrassment and shame, not OVERRIDE IT. But if you feel aroused there is nothing wrong with this. It is not a cause for further embarrassment. We won’t use arousal, but of course it may appear.
 
YOU DON’T HAVE TO TALK! In spite of being called classes about talking about sex, there is no requirement to talk! Feeling forced is counter productive. And don’t worry, someone will talk. There are always people eager to talk. Then others become comfortable joining in.
 
Is it embarrassing to talk with your mate about what you are doing? About what you want to do? About what he or she is doing? Over breakfast do you reflect over sex you had the night before? What was different, when the arousal came and when it left? Any fears that showed up, feelings of needing to please even when you wanted to do something else? Do you want your partner’s reassurance that you look good enough? That you are sexy enough? Can you ask if your partner is having difficulty becoming aroused when you perceive this? Can you say that your arousal flags when your partner isn’t very interested?
 
This is a very short list of things partners discuss when they have complete freedom to follow their sexuality, follow their relationship, instead of trying to make something happen. Couples who don’t fall into a sexual routine talk about all of these things!

 
When I started dating, my French friend and I shared stories of our sexual behavior with men we were with. Quickly we learned that men are surprised to find women who will talk about sex, who feel no embarrassment when describing what they are doing, what they like, and what they are appreciating. We talked about intimate things with our men, who told us that they found this new. Women don’t talk in detail about sexual relating.
 
I have specialized in sexuality in my psychological practice for 23 years, and in that time I have seen that even clients who willingly talk about their sexual issues cannot describe to me what they do sexually with their mate! It’s almost as if they don’t record the activities. The can say intercourse and oral sex. They can say that they have orgasms. They can refer to penises and vaginas. Most can use the slang expressions for sexual body parts and behaviors. These are all in the media so we have language for them. We can perceive and name those things and acts that are naturally built into our language.
 
However, these same people can’t describe what it feels like to have a penis in one’s mouth, the sensation as it goes from soft to hard, what the orgasm actually feels like. They can’t tell me how sex gets started. It just happens. They don’t know if it begins with kissing or breast stimulation or penis and vulva stimulation even though they follow the same formula each time. Even when I ask a woman to observe and tell me the next session, she rarely can.
 
Why not?
 
The embarrassment that comes with sex, that is attached to it, keeps us from imprinting our behaviors into memory. We keep it separate, in a compartment. And then it isn’t possible to remove that embarrassment, heal from it, and keep it from inhibiting us from the fully loving use of sex.
Some women have been sexually violated, or sexually shamed during childhood, and this inhibits comfort being sexual. And, even more pervasive, our culture prevents almost everyone from talking about sex in an open, straightforward, descriptive, revealing manner – a kind of talking that isn’t erotic, that isn’t titillating. Just the facts.

We will heal ourselves from the influence of the culture. We will come to see sex for what it is – a very pleasurable way of interacting that bonds two people into a couple. It can become ordinary, even while it is an extraordinary experience. We will come to understand that all those people in the grocery store, the mall, and the office have sex, too. That all of us have touched the body parts of others, that we have all had sexual arousal, that we take our clothes off and bring our bodies together. This is ordinary. We will deeply grasp that the portrayal of sex in pornography isn’t accurate. That kind is designed to create arousal from the outside-in, and isn’t the inside-out form that is so wonderful when a couple is falling in love. Or when they have been together for decades and re-establish their couple-hood.

We all know these things now, of course. Further conversation can allow us to grasp it more deeply, more completely.

CLASSES
1. No one has to talk! If you want to just listen, this is fine. In fact, it makes sense to see what is going on in the class before talking in ways that will trigger your embarrassment.
2. First class is FREE! You are invited to three hours in order to find out if this is useful before committing time and money. Class is limited to 16 women.
3. Endless classes. Three more classes are priced very low – only $40 each. These classes will have a maximum of 12 women. Subjects regarding sex will expand to include sexual issues. After that groups that are more focused, and limited to 8 women each, will meet weekly. The charge will be $60 per week.

Leave a voice mail or email so we can talk before the class meets. I will give you directions, as the address under “contacts” isn’t accurate.
Hope to see you here!
Anne
 
 
 
 
 
 
Sexual Healing
SEXUAL HEALING CLASSES
ARE OFFERED ON A REGULAR BASIS. CHECK BACK HERE FOR THE NEXT SCHEDULED CLASS.
 
CLASSES MEET WEEKLY FOR THREE WEEKS
cost is $75 in advance for all three weeks
 
 
HEALING SEXUAL SHAME
A WORKSHOP FOR WOMEN
With a maximum of 20 women in a comfortable room, we will address any issues associated with sex. While you may resolve the issue, the purpose is to benefit from talking about it with others who won’t judge. This is the most powerful shame healer! With sufficient interest, an advanced workshop will be held to continue relieving shame that became associated with sex.
 
You are invited to a one day workshop for women who want to heal sexual shame. We will meet in a warm, private room, and no one will be required to talk. Everyone is invited to tell experiences and have all the emotions that come. We will have a maximum of 20 women.
 
We will talk about all kinds of sexual experiences including first menstruation, first sexual encounter, rape, religious prohibitions, cultural shaming of sex, sexual abuse, and shaming sexual comments by parents and other adults. We can explore avoiding sex, fear of being bad in bed, preoccupation with sex, preoccupation with romantic fantasy, being bored with sex, and anything where talking can help remove shame.
 
Women will leave with information about how to continue the process of shame healing. Each will be given a copy of my book, Healing Humanity: Life Without Shame.